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Guess what everyone?! I (David) am going to restart this bad boy! I know you have been frantically checking your emails and google searching for the blog for years, holding your breath in anticipation of another wonderful post from me and Erin. You can finally exhale. Obviously a lot has changed in the time that has gone by. This blog was started by a young couple living and learning about China together. We are still doing that, just more separately than before. We are no longer dating but still good friends, living only a few minutes from each other and still see each other a decent amount. It has been a year and half since we broke up, but I am glad we are mature enough to still be able to talk without (much) difficulty. She’s the best (I am also the best). 😉

OK, I am going to get more bloggy/emo I think, meaning I plan on just writing about whatever I feel like rather than explaining in detail my travels or some aspect of China. To quickly catch people up to what I am doing, I am still working for an exchange student company in Beijing. It is a decent gig, I love my boss and most of my coworkers, there is a decent amount of traveling involved, and it has some interesting moments. I live in a pretty nice apartment (very nice for Chinese standards) with my Finnish roommate and rabbit. I recently traveled to the USA for work, then went directly on vacation for 2 weeks to Singapore and Malaysia with my Chinese girlfriend (now potentially ex gf). I will try to add some pictures of my apartment and the trip to Singapore and Malaysia which I will describe a bit later. For now, I want to talk about pretty much the ONLY THING I HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT FOR LIKE 3 WEEKS, which is the relationship with the Chinese girl I just mentioned. I told you this was going to get more emo…(if you don’t know, emo is a derogatory slang word for emotional).

Anyway, I met this girl about a year ago and we had an instant connection which is hard to explain (or could have just been I thought she was really hot and funny, but that isn’t very romantic). She reminded me in some ways of Erin, mainly in that she was unafraid to tell me what she was thinking or that I was wrong…maybe too unafraid because we fought A LOT at first. We had an on and off again relationship which involved some really intense, wild, but mostly stupid fights about nothing in particular, until finally last fall I couldn’t take the instability anymore. I asked her to be more serious or I couldn’t keep seeing her, and she agreed, which began our real relationship.

A lot of Chinese girls are not confident, meek, vengeful, and nervous to the point that they can’t stand up to the everyday pressures and demands of life. My gf has pressures from her parents/job/relationships, but deals with them as best as she can. She is the life of the party and easy to talk to, and unlike most Chinese people (women in particular), she is a PITBULL. When she is angry she is pretty much unstoppable and extremely difficult to calm down, which I liked most of the time, unless it was at me. An example of her confidence/fury/nature occurred at the zoo. The Beijing zoo is a fairly depressing zoo with horrible habitats for the animals, and the Chinese visitors are as poorly behaved as people can be when viewing animals in unnatural habitats. We made a good time of it, walking around the various exhibits, finally getting to the big animals section. As we looked at a tiger pace back and forth in his tiny jungle, a young kid on his dad’s shoulders poured coke onto the tiger. I tried to say something but everyone was laughing too hard to hear me. When he did it a second time, my gf went ballistic. She started yelling at the kid and then his dad then all the people laughing saying “This is why the world looks down on us”, “I shouldn’t have to raise your stupid kid” and “you are an embarrassment to the Chinese people”. I am rarely at a loss for words, but I could only watch in disbelief and excitement at her screaming what I wish I could have. When I say screaming, I mean SCREAMING. Nobody did anything to the poor tiger after that, and this was one of the first times I told her that I loved her. Chinese people NEVER confront strangers like that…it was pretty amazing and I will hopefully never forget it.

For months after this, things were pretty stable and we hung out more and more. She helped me in every way that she could…find a new apartment, get cheap furniture, teach me some Chinese…and my friends all liked her being around and could easily see why we were together. It takes a rare girl to put up with all of the stupid things that I do and say, but this girl did it and even liked it most of the time. She was my favorite Chinese person without a doubt, and of course she had her problems, but we talked and listened to each other and things kept getting better and better.

We decided to travel to Singapore and Malaysia during the Chinese New Year because her family was not in Beijing. Traveling with your significant other elevates the emotions in my opinion, and as I definitely experienced with Erin and my family, there are going to be some tense moments. We had a few fights, but nothing too bad, and overall the trip was great. We were both a spectacle for most of the Malaysian people we saw in the rural areas we traveled, especially her wearing a bikini or short dress. The Malaysian women wore long pants and head scarves so it seemed that the Malaysian guys appreciated seeing her wardrobe choices. We really explored a lot of both places, and neither one of us was ready to go back. Things were serious between us, but also seriously good. I still had one lingering doubt throughout the relationship. I had a slight nagging feeling that I was going to crush her the longer that we dated.

I am 28 and 1.5 years out of an 8 year relationship…I still need some time to meet people and figure out what I want. She is 32 and talked about wanting kids before she was 35, even saying that even if we were not together, she would want to have a baby with me because my genes are the best she has encountered (go Jacobs/Stewart DNA!). I thought there was only a small chance that I would marry her, which had less to do with her and more to do with my maturity level. I am simply not ready to make that commitment to her or anyone and I don’t think I will be for years, if I ever will be (sorry family). People tell me this changes when you get to around 30, but I don’t think I will be ready by then either. Anyways, we had a long discussion about this and for whatever reason I decided it was best if we broke up. I consider myself pretty logical and try to be “tough”, but I was a wreck for days, crying more than I had in years. She did everything right, treated me so well, and I still hurt her in the end. She put no pressure on me but I do think she understands where I am coming from. We haven’t really talked in 3 weeks, but like I said before, she is on my mind constantly. I am worried if I meet any girl in China, I will never even give them a chance because they won’t be as good as she was to me. That is pretty much where I am at today…no idea what to do, want to be with her but sort of feel like I should end it for the reasons I explained. My friends are tired of hearing about it, but when it is the only thing I am thinking about, what can I do? If anyone still reads this blog, give me some advice! Haha.

Well…hopefully this is the first of many posts that I make in the near future. I also hope you keep reading and I will keep you updated on any exciting developments in my life. I am not sure she will want to, but if Erin wants to post again, I hope she does. Take a look at the pics from Singapore and Malaysia…the famous Merlion, swimming monkeys, Langkawi island, and some pics of the lovely girl I just discussed. Hope everyone is doing well, peace.

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